Kill a Tree for Me

The Jazz Bus: Kill a Tree for Me
The elections are over and the ballots all finally counted, the results are in with a few still being contested. No hanging chads this time, no “oh, he’s your brother the governor” scam, just good old time nasty “he say she say” politics. Finger pointing, outing the opponent for doing this or not doing that or for being “in-bed” with The Speaker of The House while never hinting at what this politician stood for, just against.
Then on Election Day I get to the polling place and knowing in advance a new system was being used I prepared for long lines and in-depth explanations on the procedure. But, ah, not to be. The line was non-existent, and the usual cast of characters from the Board of Elections was in place, mostly my neighbors. After some small talk about our respective families I signed in, got my number which was recorded at the next table, and proceeded to the third table to pick up my paper ballot. Already I was missing the security of the mysterious curtain surrounding the voting machine. The old lever system was good enough for me and the environment too, I think. But more on that later. So I instructed to use a black magic marker hooked to string (no one will steal that sucker) located in the “privacy booth”. This marker was the same one you probably used, as did the guys coughing, sneezing, and wheezing after me. Swine flu here I come. While this unsanitary situation was bad enough for me, it got worse. The most offensive thing to me was handing my completed ballot face up to a guy, my neighbor, who inserted it into the machine to register my vote. He certainly got an eyeful. Leaving a bit uncomfortable I later spoke to friends who felt the same way. Secret ballot, democracy.
A few days later I read in the local paper that millions of unused preprinted ballots, which can never be used in future elections, remain. All must be collected and stored by The Board of Elections for two full years. Accountability, in case they are falsely submitted or something to that effect. While the printing costs were astonishing to begin with, now an additional cost of over $1,000,000 will be needed to secure these unused ballots. So, trees across our great country were cut down to make paper to print these unused ballots, and now my taxes are paying to secure all the ex-trees. What a great system.
With little fanfare, no true hue and cry, a few citizens questioned why we needed a new system in the first place. Modernization, true accountability, and cost effectiveness was the gist of the answer. Your Honor, I rest my case. jazzbus@gmail.com